THE PROPOSAL

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 READ FROM THE BOTTOM UP

SHE POSTED THIS THE DAY BEFORE SHE PROPOSED.

As far as I am concerned, the conversation above is the best piece of evidence I have to counter any lies Paula may tell about me. Beyond any necessary communication about Parker, we had very limited interaction for 21 months since our relationship ended. I avoided her as much as possible. Just as the discard came out of nowhere, Paula proposed to me out of nowhere. This happened shortly after Todd, guy #5, disappeared. She is between boyfriends. Therefore, she is trying to hoover me back into a relationship. Even if I desperately wanted to believe she was sincere, I have no idea what she expected me to do at this moment. Come running back? I did not trust her and I cannot imagine how we might have ever repaired the damage she caused.

Admittedly, I had hoped following this conversation that she might do much more to convince me. But even in this instance, her excuse of falling into a rut is dishonest and did not begin to explain anything. And again, I'm supposed to believe at the very moment she is destroying our relationship because of this rut, the relationship with a married man that she hid and lied about is platonic. If that were true, there is no way I could ever be absolutely convinced. Even her brother Brad told me shortly after she returned home from Wisconsin that he thought her behavior was due to guilt over something that happened awhile she was away. What else might he be suggesting if he did not suspect that she had cheated on me? Besides, there had been at least four other guys since Shannon. Those relationships may not qualify as cheating because we were no longer together, but does anyone expect me to okay with her being with anyone else since me given how she burned our relationship to the ground? How special should I feel that she finally realized her mistake after four or five guys?

That said, her explanation that she fell into a rut which caused her to burn the relationship down is an admission of fault. It was never about me or any of the nonsense charges she leveled against me. Of course, if I am to believe she did not cheat with Shannon, what triggered this alleged rut and why did Shannon happen to be there at the same time? If only she had told me sooner that this was all the result of a rut whatever that means, I would not have allowed the lies, threats, emotional, mental, and financial abuse plus a few good men to bother me so much. 😒

She loves and misses me. I'm a great guy. I treated her and her daughters well. She wishes she realized what she had. So, I am not the villain she painted me to be? Of course, if she were sincere and wished to prove it, it might make sense to offer me a 50-50 settlement with no strings attached, but she wasn't about to do that. She would lose control over the situation. Instead, a week later, she went in the opposition direction and threatened to pursue full custody if I did not agree to her settlement offer. (See text below). Due to the debt I incurred from the custody battle, I had reluctantly conceded on primary care and child support the previous November during mediation. I even offered to pay all medical expenses not covered by insurance. I only asked for equal time and she said no. Her threat to pursue full custody if we go to court is all about my refusal to settle for less than equal time with my son moving forward. He had been at my home nearly 70% of the time during the previous two years, but she refused to give me 50% of the time in a custody settlement. She cannot reconcile everything she said in the text above and justify denying me a 50-50 settlement. The only difference between what she agreed to with Chris in their divorce settlement and the 50-50 settlement I wanted from the start is that I wanted shared care rather than give her primary care status like he did. This is all spite on her end with no justification behind it. That said, Paula moved on to guy #6 one month later.

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